Mass Effect Comic Paramour


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She's talking about his penis.

Transcript:
Mass Effect Comic 'Paramour'

Panel 1
Kelly: We beat the collectors, commander! Isn't it great?
Shepard: Hmm? ...yeah
Kelly: Aww, Why the long face? You're not still pining for Tali, are you?

Panel 2
Shepard: It's just... we're already different species. Why does it matter that I'm a girl?
Kelly: I'm sure you'll find someone, commander. What about Garrus? He seems nice.
Shepard: Already been there. We're completely incompatible

Panel 3
Kelly: Oh come on, you two get along great
Shepard: It's like a claw hammer

Comments

Tom Gunn (IP: 97.82.249.160) 2010-05-01 20:39:41

Best short comic ever.

Xoax (IP: 76.95.90.249) 2010-05-01 21:08:14

This is hilarious.

Spock (IP: 98.95.108.201) 2010-05-01 21:18:38

Mass effect 2 not played = Joke not gotten

D:

Tingalz (IP: 208.102.79.96) 2010-05-01 21:21:03

Oh dear.

King of Losers (IP: 69.138.219.196) 2010-05-02 01:49:26

Spock:

Mass effect 2 not played = Joke not gotten

D:
________________________________________________________________________________

Just search for a picture of Garrus and then all will become clear.

Riot (IP: 213.17.117.152) 2010-05-02 04:38:45

Claw hammer, claw, claw penis. Kangaroo penis :D

Ector (IP: 76.117.24.210) 2010-05-02 06:04:41

Claw hammers you say?
Hmmmmm

Qwepir (IP: 208.102.79.96) 2010-05-02 21:31:40

@Riot. I followed you up to Claw Penis>Kangaroo Penis.
Kangaroo=Claw?

TheReindeer (IP: 84.250.163.36) 2010-05-03 10:25:43

Awesomecakes

OhSnap (IP: 98.250.20.53) 2010-05-03 10:59:52

Considering Kelly's disturbing lust for anything alien with a pulse, I'm sure she'd find that information enticing rather than abhorrent >_>

Awesome comic, I laughed well.

The Russian (IP: 67.174.59.244) 2010-05-04 23:39:45

....It's like a claw hammer.....

Chronoflect (IP: 68.35.96.209) 2010-05-16 20:33:31

Haha, her expression is great.

Dr. Horrible (IP: 86.13.75.141) 2010-05-19 13:46:26

The hammer is his penis.

Arc (IP: 24.0.19.54) 2010-05-20 06:15:11

Chafing...

W (IP: 24.22.10.159) 2010-06-05 08:03:16

Well, at least you had Kelly to try and cheer you up - though your little one night stand with her felt kind of dirty; Kelly's a bit of a freak. (and I may be a murderer, but I don't objectify the women I swoon over - I fealt like I might as well have picked her up in a bar)

(IP: 71.56.158.38) 2010-06-05 11:11:49

>one night stand

You can actually call her up whenever you want after that.

JakeOfRavenclaw (IP: 173.86.112.45) 2010-06-06 14:06:43

:D These are awesome! Great job!

Vedrit (IP: 67.186.198.230) 2010-06-10 11:52:51

Arc:
Chafing...
--------------------
Dont worry, they have a pill for that

Brea (IP: 174.65.70.34) 2010-07-02 01:44:14

Her expression at the end is great. Makes it even more hilarious!

Fan (IP: 97.82.148.26) 2010-08-06 22:02:43

I wondered the samething WHY know TALI :)

Sentience (IP: 71.202.240.188) 2010-09-04 19:36:39

Nice. At the end, Kelly seems to have a finger on a single button. Who wants to bet that broad-cast Shepard's words to engineering? The red-head does look a little pleased with herself. Anyways, good work!

Cindreb (IP: 68.41.95.230) 2010-10-11 20:46:10

Dr. Horrible.
Great.
Reference.
<3

5er (IP: 174.32.153.95) 2010-11-25 15:53:22

lmao

dash-of-balder (IP: 76.78.248.191) 2010-12-04 20:19:59

You are my favorite thing ever.

That is all.

Talimancer (IP: 95.173.33.136) 2011-02-04 12:54:26

This is why you play male Shepard

Goku! (IP: 64.15.89.254) 2011-06-12 19:07:57

wow. Funny. LOL

Crazy_4242 (IP: 174.22.189.66) 2011-07-01 02:12:08

Now thats great, I always play both side male and female so i get every inch of the story lines.

Taigan (IP: 216.143.116.8) 2011-09-08 15:04:44

I am a guy and that hurts to read. Xo

Dragon (IP: 68.7.108.186) 2011-09-12 05:54:13

I do agree with this. It was strong that Tali would go for male shepard but not female shepard. Like the comic said. It not like Tali could have male shepards baby so why not female shepard.

Sucks you have to lission to many many hours of poor voice acting just to bag tali.

brea (IP: 189.13.100.242) 2011-09-12 10:24:58

brea

Ysionris (IP: 61.227.127.118) 2011-10-15 11:41:05

Tali had better be a romantic interest for femShep in ME3

StoicVenus (IP: 168.30.194.156) 2011-11-07 10:52:50

@Ysionris: Mixed feelings about that possibility... very mixed feelings. Would love it, but would feel bad for Liara. :(